GOD BLESSES A HEART OF INTEGRITY

GOD BLESSES A HEART OF INTEGRITY

The Keys to a Blessed Life (8 Beatitudes) 

Rick Warren

July 12-13, 2014

“Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7b (NIV)

God doesn't care about your appearance, achievements, accomplishments or acquistions or your image.

He cares about your soul, the real YOU!

“God blesses those whose hearts are pure, for they will see God.” 

Matthew 5:8 (NLT)

God is more interested in your attitude than your action. 

 INTEGRITY:
BLESSINGS BROUGHT BY INTEGRITY
None of these great men were perfect: David, Noah, Moses, Abraham, Peter, etc.
But they had integrity and sought after God.

Integrity = Wholeness
Life is not compartmentalized, it is integrated not segregated.   
People who compartmentalize or segregate their life they do not have integrity: Secret life, Family Life, Career Life, etc. 

Integrity = Authenticity
Not fake, you are real always and in all ways with everybody.
Wearing masks is being 2 faced/hypocrite
Integrity is what you are and do when nobody is looking.

Integrity = Un-mixed motivation
Pure in heart, no ulterior motives.
Integrity is who you really are at your core.

“People with integrity have a firm footing, but those who follow 

crooked paths will slip and fall.” Proverbs 10:9 (NLT)

“The integrity of the honest keeps them on track.” 

Proverbs 11:3 (Mes)

Blessings of integrity:

• Confidence
• Personal stability & security
• People enjoy being around you
• Trustworthy
• Can relax
• Keeps you on track
• Integrity is a lasting legacy of blessings to future generations
• Eternal rewards
• Forgiven

“A righteous person lives on the basis of his integrity. Blessed 

are his children after he is gone.” Proverbs 20:7 (GW)

“If you pray to God and seek the favor of the Almighty, if you are 

pure and live with complete integrity, God will rise up and restore 

your happy home. And though you started with little, you will end

with much.” Job 8:5-7 (NLT)

 [God will say] “Well done! You are a good and trusted servant!

Because you were faithful with small things, I’ll now put you in 

charge of much greater things. Come and share your M aster’s 

happiness!” Matthew25:21 (NCV)

“Lord, who may stay in your sanctuary and live on your holy 

mountain? The one who WALKS WITH INTEGRITY . . . he speaks 

the truth from his heart. He refuses to slander others with his 

tongue, won’t listen to gossip, and will not cast a slur on his 

fellowman . . . [instead] he honors those who fear the Lord, and 

keeps his promises even when it hurts. He lends his money freely

without charging interest and cannot be bribed by money. 

Whoever does these things will never be shaken!” 

Psalm 15:1-5 (NIV/GW/TEV)

Treat every area of your life with the same intensity of excellence:

Your marriage

Your family

Your friends

Your career

Your community

Your church

SOME WAYS TO DEVELOP INTEGRITY

By Keeping Your Promises. Keep your word, Be reliable.
“People who promise things they never give are like clouds and 
wind that bring no rain.” Proverbs 25:14 (TEV)

Broken promises are the number one cause of bitterness in children.

Insecurity comes from a lack of integrity.

By Paying Your Debts. Financial Integrity. Don't live beyond your means. Don't defraud others or cheat on your taxes.

“The wicked man borrows and never pays back . . .”
Psalm 37:21 (TEV)

“. . . the authorities are working for God . . . Pay what you owe them; 
pay your personal and property taxes . . .”
Romans 13:6-7 (TEV)

By refusing to gossip.   Keep things confidential.

“A gossip can’t be trusted with a secret, but someone of integrity 
won’t violate a confidence.” Proverbs 11:13 (Mes)

Real friends walk in your life when others walk out.
They don't rub it in, they help rub it out.

By faithfully tithing. Trust God with your finances and putting Him first.
Wherever you put your money first, shows what is important to you.

“Is it right for a person to cheat God? Of course not! Yet you are 
robbing me, says the Lord. ‘How?’ you ask. By withholding your 
full tithe and offerings. . . Bring to me the full amount of your tithe 
to my House . . . Put me to the test and you’ll see that I will open 
the windows of heaven and pour out so much blessing on you 
that you won’t have enough room to receive it all!” 
Malachi 3:8-10 (TEV)  This is a test with a promise.

By doing your best at work.
“Work hard and cheerfully at whatever you do, as though you 
were working for the Lord rather than for people.”
Colossians 3:23 (NLT)

"A lazy employee is as destructive as a saboteur."
Proverbs 18:9

Ephesians 6:6 , Colossians 3:22-23
It is God's will that you work hard with gladness as unto the Lord. He sees everything.
Don't just do the minimum, do your best. 

By being real and authentic and genuine with others.

“We refuse to wear masks and play games. We don’t maneuver 
and manipulate behind the scenes. And we don’t twist God’s 
Word to suit ourselves. Rather, we keep everything we do and 
say out in the open . . .” 2 Corinthians4:2 (Mes)

Care more about what God thinks than what others think. Stay in His Word!

“How can I keep my way pure? By living according to your Word.”
Psalm 119:9 (NIV)

The first step is: Ask God to show you areas you need to clean up.
Admit: "Confession of bad works, is the beginning of good works." Saint Augustine

The Titanic Myth:
It was supposed to be the first unsinkable ship because it was the first compartmentalized segmented hull.
However a hole can sink you and take you down no matter what.
Excuses: "It's my life, I can handle it, it is none of your business, everybody else is doing it, what they don't know won't hurt them, etc."
Sin will always effect others and will find you out.

This is why we need a Savior and grace and forgiveness.
None of us are perfect and always does what is right.
We have all failed and sinned.
You will never be sinless... but you can sin less.
It is a choice of integrity!
I don't always do the right thing... but I want to do my best... offer it as prayer to God.

HOW TO RECONCILE A RELATIONSHIP

HOW TO RECONCILE A RELATIONSHIP

The Keys to a Blessed Life (8 Beatitudes) – Part 7

Rick Warren
July 26-27, 2014

Conflict resolution is an important life skill to learn and needs to be taught.

How to restore a broken relationship

 “God blesses those who are peacemakers, for they will be called 
the children of God.” Matthew 5:9 (NLT)

The characteristic of a true believer is being a "peace maker" not avoiding or appeasing others that is cowardliness or enabling.

Currently we have 5 major world wars occurring, without including conflicts and battles interpersonal, political, religious, etc., etc., etc. 

It blocks my relationship with God.
I can't be close to God if I have conflict with others in my life.
You can't love God whom you can't see, if you can't love those whom you can see.
If you claim you love God and hate others - you are a liar.

It blocks my prayers.
My prayers won't be heard or answered.
God is love, and He wants us to love and learn to love.
If you are in conflict - you are not loving.
Husbands treat wives with respect and consideration so nothing hinders your prayers.

It blocks my happiness.
If relationships stink, life stinks.
If your marriage isn't working, or out of harmony with your family - life is not happy.

MISCONCEPTIONS ABOUT PEACEMAKING DAMAGE CAUSED BY UNRESOLVED CONFLICT
Those who are peace makers will reap a harvest of goodness by planting seeds of peace.
It is a law of the universe.
 Sowing and reaping - you plant one seed, it will multiply back to you. 

“Those who are peacemakers will plant seeds of peace and reap a
harvest of goodness.” James 3:18 (NLT)

HOW TO BE A PEACEMAKER

 1. You make the first move... take the initiative to make peace.
It is more important than worship or going to church.
“If you’re standing before the altar in the Temple, giving an
offering to God, and you suddenly remember someone has
something against you, leave your offering there beside the altar.
Go at once and first be reconciled to that person. Then come and
offer your gift to God.” Matthew 5:23-24 (NLT)

Time does not heal anything... things get worse as you allow it to fester and grow more bitter the more you procrastinate.  The only way to resolve conflict is to face it.

What causes us to postpone?  Fear of conflict.
We become withdrawn and detached due to fear of rejection.
The more insecure you are in a relationship the more demanding, defensive and distant you become.
Where do you find the courage to make the first move?  To deal with that person?
The Holy Spirit of God's love.  Get full of God, and He will help you overcome.
We never change until the love exceeds our fear and pain.

2. Ask God for wisdom.
“If you want to know what God wants you to do, ask Him, and He
will gladly tell you . . .” James 1:5 (LB)

Ask God for help with the timing, approach, and what to say.
Think of who you have a strained relationship with and pray for them.

Confess your faults first... start with how you were wrong.
If I am full of myself, I am ultra sensitive.
If I am full of the Holy Spirit, I am full of peace and love, so conflict won't bother me.

3.When I am at peace with God inside, what happens outside doesn't upset me. 
“What causes fights and quarrels among you? They are caused by
selfish desires that are continually at war inside you?” James 4:1

There is no such thing as incompatible.... we are all different and we can choose to get along and choose to love or not.  To have a successful marriage/relationship "grow up!"  Immaturity causes relationships to die.
Flexibility and willingness to change makes relationships successful otherwise they will fail.

The greatest the differences you have the greatest potential for growth.
You can learn from anybody if you are willing to be humble, unselfish, open minded, flexible.

It is always more rewarding to resolve conflict than dissolve a relationship. 
Human nature is self centered and stubborn.  Good relationships require we think less about ourself and more about others.

Humble people don't get feelings hurt easily.
Prideful people are ultra sensitive and moody.

“Pride only leads to arguments . . .” Proverbs 13:10 (NCV)
“Why do you notice the little piece of dust in your friend’s eye,
but you don’t notice the big piece of wood in your own eye? . . . First,
take the wood out of your own eye. Then you will see clearly to
take the dust out of your friend’s eye.” Matthew 7:3,5 (NCV)

Break the ice of conflict :
"I am sorry, I was only thinking of myself....." ideal phrase to memorize and recite repeatedly. 
Come to resolve conflict humbly and begin with yourself. 

Look for your own blind spots.
Listen to their hurt and perspective.
Listen to the emotion behind the words.
See what they need.
We argue over emotions and feelings instead of ideas.
Somebody feels abused, slighted, causes hurts more than ideas.

Hurt people hurt people.
The people who need love the most, deserve it the least. 
The most obnoxious difficult, unloving, unloveable people are the hardest to love, but need it the most.
You need to see why they 
When people feel de-valued, unappreciated, neglected... they hurt.
Start with what they need.

4.Conflict resolution means you need to focus.
 You are more like Jesus when you focus on somebody else instead of yourself. 
Seek to understand, before seeking to be understood. 
See their circumstance, their temperament, their background.
You will be more patient when you are understanding and see where they are coming from and see their hurts and pain and what they have been through. 

“. . . be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.”
James 1:19 (NLT)

If you listen and watch your words you will control your anger.
When you are quick to anger, you are not watching your words or listening.
Always listen first before speaking!
Then people feel validated when you listen.
Eye contact and paying attention is very loving.

“Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to
the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of
Christ Jesus.” Philippians 2:4-5 (NIV)
“. . . we must bear the ‘burden’ of being considerate of the doubts and
fears of others . . .” Romans 15:2 (LB)

Look beyond behavior towards the person's fears and doubts.
The problem is our fears are rational and normal and other's fears are irrational and abnormal.
All fears are irrational!
FEAR - False Evidence Appearing Real
Irrational - Rational Lies

5. Speak the truth tactfully with kindness and love.
Being brutally honest is rude and selfish.  Telling it like it is... is being a jerk.
If you say it offensively it will be received defensively.
They will remember the emotion more than the words or topic.
The moment you start yelling- the other person will stop listening and you have lost the argument.
you are never persuasive when you are abrasive.
you never get your point across when you are cross.
Never use the truth as a club... wrap it in love.
Truth with love is received. Truth without love is resisted.

“Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise
brings healing.” Proverbs 12:18 (NIV)
Foolish words hurt.
Wise words heal.
It is all in the way you say it.

Religious fanatics spiritually vomit on everybody to feel better about themselves, but everybody else is repulsed by it.

“Do not use harmful words, but only helpful words, the kind that
build up and provide what is needed . . .” Ephesians 4:29 (TEV)

2 imperfect people can't have a perfect relationship.
Establish ground rules so you do not destroy yourselves or each other.
Learn the triggers to avoid.  Fight fair.
Don't threat divorce. Close the escape hatch and said it is not an option.

During the cold war from 1950's to 1989.  The leaders agreed that WMDs weapons of mass destruction were off limits. Atomic bombs were banned. You need to ban the WMDs from your marriage. Make a list of the harmful and hurtful words that are banned.

6. Fix the problem not the blame. 
 Attack the issue, not the blame. 
BLAME is spelled: "Be lame"
As long as you attack each other, you are not attacking the issues to be resolved.
Blame, shame game is a waste of time.

“You must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, 
malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips.” 
Colossians 3:8 (NIV) 7.

Labeling, belittling, analyzing, slandering, insulting, gossip, etc.

Focus on reconciliation not resolution.
Re-establish the relationship.
Bury the hatchet.
Do not hold on to the hurt.
Resolution on everything is not always possible. You can agree to disagree.
You can have unity without uniformity.
You can walk hand in hand without seeing eye to eye on things.
Restore the relationship and the issue will appear insignificant.

Reconciliation = reestablish the relationship
Resolution = resolve every issue

Our world is filled with constant conflict and stress.
Broken lives, hearts, economy, etc.
Commit to become a bridge builder, not a wall builder.
Look for ways to bring people together instead of tearing them apart.
This is your ministry to be a peace maker, restoring relationships and reconciliation.

“God has restored our relationship with him through Christ, and has
given us this ministry of restoring relationships. God was in Christ
restoring his relationship with humanity.
He didn’t hold people’s faults against them, and he has given us this message of restored
relationships to tell others. We are Christ’s representatives . . .
We beg you on behalf of Christ to become reunited with God.”
2 Corinthians 5:18-20 (GW)